I arrived to good ol' and sweet Texas, and what am I doing here?
Better question, I am asking myself ... why have I not been here?
Until
both questions get figured out, I will keep writing and sharing my
#unvarnished experiences that leave me inspired and so wish and hope
they inspire you.
This blog is part of my growing
immediate family. We have gone through the 9 months of conceiving to birth, and just recently, the terrible 2's. We have easily spent hours of
creativity like the ones you can spend with a good culinary friend, an
open kitchen and unlimited imagination. She has taught wisdom and
discipline like a mother, and like a sister, between her lines, I
confess my deepest secrets.
I
come to be unvarnished. Unvarnished from all the layers of
conditioning, the varnished layers which intend to make me look prettier
than I am. I want to know and feel the Natural State of Being.
I began to notice this haunting cycle about myself which went something like this:
Damaris complains about her situation.
Damaris whines, grunts, screams and cries about her situation.
The good life magically brings forth an opportunity.
Damaris still whining, misses the opportunity, OR better yet, Damaris, willingly, turns it down.
Damaris sees no where else to go but back onto the wheel for the next round... on for another blissful and haunting round.
My mother would always say, "Ay Damaris, te gusta la mala vida." You love the bad life.
I
gave into that thought for many years making me believe I was destined
to pain and suffering. I agreed, I mean, that is all I knew and had
experienced in all my human senses.
Today, through
further exploring, I understand the human race to be creatures of
habit. Habits ground us. Repeated habits and its continued consistency
makes us feel comfortable and cozy at home.
Pain and
suffering had become comfortable and cozy. My habit evolving into sacred
addictions of many sorts bleeding into fine lines of poetry in my life,
creating fine art, and so they say, fine wine.
If I
was blessed with an overdose on any particular gift it would have to be
in the optimism department. Those who know me well, would agree. I dream
big, I believe big. I love big. I fall big. I poker face big... and
happiness just seems to be getting more vague.
But far into the tunnel a strong and bright light shines. Believe me, it shines.
I
share my story, my journey, to share my passion of hope and inspiration
so to see the Magic they hold as they are the true soldiers of our
conquests.
I am a woman. I am a mother. I am
a survivor. My name tag holds heavy responsibilities sometimes hard to
swallow, but today I only worry
about the breath of this moment. Today, being alive is more important
than just living. Today I am alive, and for today, that is enough.
I don't allow others to ask of me more than I ask of myself. I am perfect as I am.
Life
has presented me with another opportunity to leap. Surfside and
Freeport, Texas. Loves, today ... I am leaping. I am taking this poker
face off. I am sitting down on the shores of Mother Earth, and I will
allow my tears to run and my shouts to be. I will patiently wait until
one of Her waves touches my soul and washes them all away...
I could be a responsible adult and give the practical explanation as to
why I chose to leap off the wheel and not play this game anymore, that
would be lovely, but it too, would be silly.
I am not a
victim of life, but I am a survivor. As I hold that title, I too have
the full responsibility to share my story with you and hope you too dare
to dream far beyond the stars and the moon... how about "The Galaxy".
I
welcome you to my family, this blog, as I share my adventures. I cannot
tell you where I am going, what I will find, or when I will be back..
but I can tell you what I experience and what I learn from it.
Life does get beautiful, dear ones. Believe me. It truly is.
Queen Goddess

gorgeous
ReplyDeleteTrue believer
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