The Search of I (Earth Day, April 22, 2015 in Sedona Pictures and Adventures Cont. Pt 3)

The hardest thing I've had to do is leave all I know, for the mystery of the unknown, to rebuild my "spiritual" life and find the words that define it.

I was raised as a Jehovah's Witness. I followed through until my young adult life believing it to be the only True religion, therefore I supported it with all my heart and soul's energy. The spiritual world was prominent in my life.


But with time these firm and sometimes rigorous routines began to feel uncomfortable to the point of suffocating and I wanted out. I loved them dearly; they were so good to me. I did not want to hurt anybody, I did not want to make a scene, I just wanted to melt and slip right through the crack of the door and run. Unfortunately, these ties are not easily broken when you have committed your-self, your-soul and especially your-mind to a highly organized membership, which is paid on a monthly basis with your sweat, love and memories, like we all pay for the passions we believe in.

In human terms, this passion was picked for me, and I allowed it to define me. But the time arrived for me to pick my own burning desire, it was time for me to dream.

So I let it all go, my beliefs, my family, my friends, my husband my home and all I've known to search for the essence and truth of who I was, am and destined to be.

The beating drums and the native flute... , just like the perfect song that plays on the FM radio right when you needed, have always been the medicine to my soul and the warm bandages to the little broken pieces of my heart, wrapping it all back a whole.

3 years ago I attended a drumming circle where I played my first drum with my bare hands and my bare spirit. The bass awoke something I had not yet discovered. Here I discovered a variety of beautiful and different people, different colors, and different minds with no one set belief. Instead, I received an invitation and a couple of borrowed paintbrushes to begin painting the canvas of my own Truth. I healed. 

At one of these drumming circles, I heard about "Sedona" and the gatherings they have at this magical place. They talked about it as if it was heaven and no suffering could ever tag along. I had no idea where Sedona was, what they would do there, much less who the people were, but She sang loud and clear in all my desires and pure ambitions. This day I knew I was destined to visit Sedona and experience her grace and beauty, and maybe then I would understand why it captured my attention so profoundly. *

And here I am standing in Sedona 3 years later surrounded by all the healing elements I've ever needed.

I will not shy away and say I didn't cry at first sight; she was a beauty. I was in love. I was home. I was healed.
Queen Goddess

*Please read additional note at the bottom

Driving towards Eagle Quetzal Condor Gathering

on Earth Day April 22, 2015

  

  

Tents where Elders met and/or others did
healing work and dancing ceremonies

Additional note: Being raised as a Jehovah's Witness and later being limited to the interaction with friends and family strictly in that circle created a hole which left me discouraged, but especially deeply confused... but a hole that was filled to overflowing in this particular gathering in Sedona. It touched a deep and very special place in my heart which I lack words to express. It took me back to memories when I attended the conventions/assemblies we used to have (as a JW's) where many JW's from different parts of the world would come together to embrace and recharge with each others unconditional love.

At this gathering in Sedona, there too, were many beautiful people from different parts of the world coming together for the purpose of co-creation in the expansion of the pure love that resides within humanity as we handed it over to Mother Earth so to heal her as She heals us. Maybe this is why it resonated so warmly with me...
... because what seemed to have been taken away from my hands in fact was returned in magnitude and with greater love right back to me. Life can surprise us in so many mysterious yet exciting ways. Allow it.

If you had the honor and privilege of being a or are a Jehovah's Witness and battle through guilt, depression, loneliness, please, allow my experience to demonstrate the beauty that awaits for when ever you are ready and where ever you decide to walk onward.

Taking a break from a Dance Ceremony to take 
a hike up the mountains with Me, Myself and I

The bliss I felt up here was breathtaking. I had my own sacred space while simultaneously sharing it with the whole world as Divine Universe, God, Source and All One entertained me with the most intriguing conversations. I recorded a video blooming many emotions which I wish to share in the future. It's amazing how good it feels to cry. It was much needed. Thank you, Momma Earth.